When Amy Was Bad
by walkthatlonesomevalley
Summary: Amy cruelly toys with Karma after a painful year away.
1. Chapter 1

***WARNING**: **this one hurts***

*for the record: i love amy and karma. i hope that amy never ever ever gets mean like i'm about to write her in this fic. this is pretty much loosely inspired by BTVS: When She Was Bad. It's the first episode of season 2 and you can jump ahead to minute 24 if you want to see where my inspiration came from*

**When Amy Was Bad**

**Part I**

It had been a year since the wedding. A painful year. Farrah took Amy out of public school and sent her away to the East Coast where Karma Ashcroft couldn't touch her and the ideals of an almost military schedule at a religious all girls school could help to straighten her priorities out.

It was summer now and Amy was supposedly coming back. Karma hadn't heard from her. Amy didn't write and she didn't call.

It was Amy who had done the bad thing. Amy had chosen to fuck Liam Booker on the night of her mother's wedding after Karma spurned her love and sent her off into the night alone.

Karma tried to find her though. She tried to help.

It only took a few days for Karma to get nervous and investigate. She pestered a full breakdown out of Lauren and almost died when Lauren brought up religious prep school. Farrah had caught them together, Liam and Amy, and she had known right away what Amy had done. Extreme measures were taken. Amy was gone within the week. Put in summer school just to busy her. She was watched by day and locked in by night clear across the country where Karma couldn't help her.

After much stalking and prying Karma eventually got the name of the religious school where Amy was sent. She drove all the way out but security was tight. She stalked the grounds and waited outside the heavy rod-fences until Amy had PE. She yelled after her and Amy saw.

Amy ignored her though. She looked crushed. Karma tried for three straight days but there was no change and nothing she could do.

The year had been brutal without her. Pointless. She was over Liam Booker and over it all. All she wanted was to have Amy back.

She tried talking to Farrah but Amy's mom wasn't interested in alternative solutions. It didn't help either that Farrah secretly disliked Karma Ashcroft.

Around December Karma began to have the dreams. Amy flew home for winter break and Karma ran into her at the store and hugged her. Amy pushed her off and left without speaking. She didn't even look at her. She was like a robot, cruel and blank.

When Karma went to her house Amy had Farrah tell her to leave.

Karma dreamed about Amy on that very first night after seeing her. They were kissing and in bed. Amy was smiling and they laughed. It had been so long since Karma had seen Amy smile. She woke up happy then started to cry.

That was Christmas morning, the turning point.

For the rest of the year, Karma wrote Amy but received no answer. She realized rather soon after Christmas that she was in love with her, like really in love and she sent her long letters pleading for her to at least send that she heard.

With Amy gone it was all clear. Amy was Karma's reason to live. Her only reason.

**Part II **

Shane had watched Karma all year. After breaking up with Liam and losing Amy she retreated to her own company and spent most of her time alone looking sorrowful and serious. A broken shell of the bubbly person she had once been.

Naturally he felt bad for her. They had never been friends but Shane was worried about Amy and Karma obviously felt that way too.

If Amy ever wrote Shane would tell her. But she wasn't close with him like before. If she wrote at all it was a small fourword text.

The one he received two weeks ago simply said: Coming Home.

That's how Karma knew what was happening.

And when he got the text saying simply: El Fuego Saturday Night, he told Karma right away.

She was desperate and she had to go.

The preparation was intense. Shane took her shopping and helped her pick out a tight dress, a sexy one. They did her hair up big and put it up in just the right way. Shane wanted to guarantee that she looked the sexiest she had ever looked.

It was a full day of tears from Karma and nervousness. Shane was pushing her though, he supported her in every way. They became the most unlikely of friends, even Lauren had been texting them since Amy seemed different, not like herself at all.

"What if it's like Christmas?" Karma asked, dabbing at the tears under her eyes in front of the mirror with a white kleenex in her hands.

"Karma, you can't think that way." He said, kneeling beside her and hoping things could work. Her make-up was already running and they had just finished putting it on. She looked hot. She was ready. "Just breath and remember all the years that you've had. If Amy sees you like this she'll melt," Shane insisted. He wasn't sure but he wanted it to work in his deepest heart.

They got to the club early because missing her at all was not an option.

The music was loud and they got sprite sodas at the bar.

El Fuego had all-age night on the third Saturday of the month. The dj knew what it was about, people came to El Fuego to hook-up. If you weren't dancing you were making out on the couches and if you weren't doing either of those things you were in the parking lot having sex in your parents borrowed empty cars.

The music would get you hot and the rest was up to you.

Karma never came to El Fuego, ever. And as far as she knew, neither did Amy. But Amy would be there today, she would come. Karma wondered why, she just hated it, not knowing.

She waited with Shane for hours, worrying and pacing. She went to the bathroom three times, had two refills and an order of fries. And she ignored the many advances from the girls and boys from school who had wanted her ever since all her secrets came out. Karma Ashcroft had become a bit of a target for sexual advances. People weren't joking about it either. She was hot and they wanted her. She could sing and she had balls, she went after what she wanted and appeared to date both girls and guys.

Shane had much to do with that rep being what it was. After Amy left he felt so bad he began to spread rumors about how good she was in the sack. How Liam could never ever have better. It was crude and very high school but he did it all the same just to see her smile on a slow day when someone felt brave enough to talk her up.

**Part III**

The night was late when Amy arrived. The club would only be open for another hour since it was 11 o'clock.

Karma saw her right away. Amy entered and it was like all the air just sucked out of the room. Karma looked her up and down. She was wearing tall black heels and a very short black dress, it was tight and hugged her everywhere. The look in Amy's eyes was dead cold and blank. Her hair tumbled over her shoulders in ringlets and when she walked she hit on the beat without even trying. A club mix of Lana Del Rey's Dark Paradise began to play.

The most out of place thing was the plain silver crucifix that dangled effortlessly over Amy's chest at the end of a very average silver chain.

Effortless and calculated, Amy oozed sex. Karma watched her, swallowing hard. It was like a slow-mo reveal, when someone enters and the music automatically slows. She waited and her own chest heaved. Her heart pounded where she stood, simply paralyzed by the sight of her.

This wasn't her Amy. This was a new Amy. Karma's Amy had changed.

Shane watched nervously. Karma had been staring so throughout that there was no way in hell he could've missed it. It didn't matter how much time had gone by or how lonely Karma had been. Amy was here now and so was Karma. They were together in the same room and he was waiting for it, just waiting.

He had never seen Amy like this.

She was tall and faultless, and she seemed to have no nerves or qualms.

She walked up to Karma and grabbed her hand without talking.

Karma followed feeling scared. Her heart pounded because of all the dreams she had had. She wanted Amy so much. In that dress with that hair, in those heels with that ass.

It was all she could do to just follow without speaking. She wanted to know her again, to make sure she was alright. She wanted to touch her and talk.

Amy pulled her onto the floor and immediately began dancing. Twisting with her knees together and dipping in front of Karma's body on the floor, her head reaching all the way down to Karma's stomach before coming up again real close, almost brushing her breasts and her lips.

"Shit," Karma breathed, trying to dance with Amy writhing sexily in front of her.

Amy came closer closing any gap. She put her hands on Karma's ass and pulled Karma into her by her ass so that she could rub to the music and feel that heat as the current of the music flowed and the beat took over her. She closed her eyes in the feeling of Karma against her just like she had always wanted.

Karma gasped when Amy brought her face near. She wrapped her hands behind Amy and tried to hug her but Amy took one of Karma's hands and turned into her so that her ass would be against Karma's front and Karma couldn't hug her like she wanted, she couldn't have her sweetly, not to today.

Amy dipped again and came up and started to rub on Karma. She moved her hair to one said and pushed Karma's face into her neck until Karma's lips touched her and she gasped.

Karma felt her whole body on fire. Amy was controlling her and she was hot. When Amy rubbed Karma felt it. The writhing was exciting but hard. Karma ached into it and let it be. Amy pulled Karma's hand onto her hip and Karma pulled her into her, breathing hard in her ear, moving her other hand up into Amy's hair and pushing Amy's head into hers so that she wouldn't twist away again.

Amy turned around anyway, it wouldn't work the way Karma had wanted. Karma lost her balance and almost fell but Amy caught her and rose her up, slipping her leg between Karma's and holding her to her like a baby doll, rolling her own body until she could see the desire in Karma's eyes. She ran a hand to the back of Karma's neck and pushed her into her and kissing her hard. She had pulled Karma's hair too and pushed her again, forcing her to kiss her and gasping when they broke

Karma loved it, it was hot. She felt her body react with Amy's leg beneath her and rubbing consistently at her center.

The song was about to end and Karma already felt like puddy in Amy's hands. Amy had come like a storm and taken over her, having her way. She had kissed her and pulled her hair, wrapped her up like a tornado, keeping her scared but grounded while she circled her and took what she wanted.

"Did you miss me?" Amy asked. Karma smiled into the kiss that Amy gave. Karma shook her head yes as Amy kissed her, pulling Karma's body into her tight and pushing down on Karma's hip bone, turning her on as they danced. Karma was only seconds from an orgasm. Amy had been that unexpected and that hot. Pushing her down onto her leg, kissing Karma again before breaking. "And don't you wish I'd say sorry?" Amy asked, breathing hard and looking her in the eyes. Her face was unreadable but she seemed genuine. Karma held that gaze as long as she could. All she wanted to say was...

"Yes," Karma said desperately without thinking. None of the Liam stuff mattered at all. She just wanted Amy back.

"That's too bad," Amy said, kissing her again and pushing Karma away off of her hard by a hand at Karma's neck.

Amy turned and walked away, leaving her there.

Karma watched almost stunned, with a hand at her throat. She wavered in her heels before stumbling to her side and falling down to her knees in an explosion of tears. She was completely depleted of energy and hope. Amy had came and scooped her up and attacked her. It was like a gunshot wound to the heart. Her whole world came crashing down.

Shane saw it, he saw it all.

"What the fuck, Amy?!" He said, passing her entirely to grab Karma from up off the floor. Karma was crying hard and holding her throat where Amy had last touched her. He pulled her up off the floor and brought her over to their stools.

Amy didn't say a thing and she didn't look back. She had gotten what she wanted.

Now Karma would hurt too.


	2. Chapter 2

*gaaahhhhh, I couldn't NOT do a second chapter. you cannot have "bad amy" without hate sex and repercussions. "When She Was Bad" was such a great episode of Buffy because it brought buffy back and it had everything come full circle in the end. it seemed random at first but made complete sense once psychologically explained. it was old school psa: is your best friend acting out? well maybe she went through something traumatic and she hasn't dealt with that yet so love her a little maybe, and help her out, within reason, because bros be bros yo, and love be a necessity*

*so yeah, chapter two and maybe three later, probably three*

*love, love, love*

**Chapter Two**

**It Doesn't Matter What I Want, It Doesn't Matter What I Need**

**Part I**

Shane drove Karma home and she cried all the way.

"She's not worth it," he said.

But it didn't help because their Amy had not be in the club tonight.

He helped Karma out of the car and walked her up to the door. When she went inside he told her mom everything and her mom seemed shocked.

"It had to be that school," Shane said, hugging himself.

"That's definitely wasn't _our_ Amy," Mrs. Ashcroft said. She remembered the sweet girl who was always around, the one who could never be mean because she didn't know how.

"Thanks for helping Shane."

"It's my pleasure," he said, not really wanting to go. Someone should stay with her. What had happened had been so very cruel.

He had a mission though. He wasn't about to just let Amy do crazy shit like that without question. Amy couldn't just come into town and torture the hell out of her best friend. She had already hurt her enough. And Karma was in love with her dammit! He wasn't even sure if she knew.

He thought back on the club and Amy's face. She seemed almost gone, like she had vanished. Her body was moving and she was obviously there but it was almost like she was a primal being with no control and no soul. He couldn't tell… Was she feeling at all?

He had to find her. He had to know.

He took his car and began to prowl. From what he had seen, Amy had arrived on foot. Unless she got a ride she couldn't have gotten far in those heels.

He went back to the club and traced the path he would walk if he were trying to get to Amy's house.

He was almost right, she took a shortcut through someone's backyard. He saw the bushes rustling and knew. His headlights shun on the wooden fence she fell off of. He watched as she stood and walked fast towards her house looking as blank and unfeeling as before. She was hurting. It was obvious.

"AMY!" He yelled, motioning her over to get in the car.

It didn't take coaxing. She got in when she got close.

"Hey, what the hell was that back there?!" Shane asked, trying not to scare her away as soon as she had settled.

"What?" Amy asked, playing with her black nailpolish and ruffling her hair. She put her barefoot up on his dash and threw her heels in his backseat.

"I saw that, Amy. You can't pretend you didn't just bring Karma to her knees."

"Whatever," Amy sighed. She was thinking about her prison. She had to go back in seven days and there was no stopping it. Either she ran away or she went back. It was hell but she had to choose. And the choice seemed beyond her. She had no control unless she ran...

She held her head in hand with her elbow resting fine on her knee. Shane just watched her and felt stunned.

"You're so different," he said, noticing how she carried herself.

"Yeah, being punished for something you didn't even want to do will do that to a person," Amy spat. She was talking of course of her affair with Liam Booker. It had been the reason she was sent to the uber-fake christian school where she was being counseled and analyzed twice daily by some sexist prick with a clipboard and a sweaty face.

"Karma loves you, ya know," Shane grimaced.

"So what. It can't happen," she said. "Are you going to take me home or should I get out." The conversation was everything wrong in her life. None of it mattered. None of it could matter. She was stuck somewhere else so being home was just a tease.

"Amy, talk to me," he begged.

"What for?! Talking only makes things worse."

She pushed her door open angrily and got out.

"Keep the heels," she said, slamming the door.

And just like that she was gone again, out of his life.

He had seen though, it was pain before anything else. Amy was suffering.

**Part II**

Karma had been hearing things about Amy's rebellion at home and how she kept sneaking out her window and going to bars and getting drunk.

Karma couldn't even imagine it. Her Amy always hated being in trouble. Just like she hated dressing up and wearing heels. Everything about her had changed. She had taken a complete 180 but Karma couldn't blame her. She knew nothing of that school. And being banished from Austin for sleeping with a boy just seemed odd and rash, a completely random turn of events.

Farrah had definitely taken things too far. Amy was not okay and Karma knew it well.

"Lauren, come on," Karma whined. "If I don't help her no one will! What do you want? Do you really want her to be unhappy and hate her whole family?" Karma begged.

"I want things to be simple. But we don't get what we want now do we Karma?!" Lauren pushed sarcastically fighting her off.

Karma had waited outside of Amy's house for someone to leave. She followed Lauren in her car and basically assaulted her outside of the gym where she had gone for morning yoga.

"Look, I love her okay," Karma pleaded.

"Yeah, well you shouldn't! Shane told me what she did to you," Lauren judged. "She's been acting like a Jerry Springer reject and we're all just letting her!" Lauren seemed pissed.

"It's not her fault," Karma said. "We don't know what it's like, none of us got sent away!" Karma had been thinking about it a lot. A religious boarding school and Amy Raudenfeld just didn't mix. Karma wouldn't be surprised if Amy just went mute for an entire year. It was no wonder she was dead inside. Karma knew her, it was what she would do.

She secretly hated Lauren for not seeing.

"Oh hell no," Lauren said. "It is too her fault. She made her bed Karma, and I am not about to lie in that sloppy untucked mess of filthy straw!"

"What are you even talking about?!" Karma asked.

"I'm saying, DEAL WITH IT!" Lauren said, pushing Karma out of the way.

"At least tell me where she is," Karma begged.

"She's home!" Lauren said. "Sleeping! Like a lazy!" Lauren didn't need this unwanted stress in her beauty mornings. She walked off to class and tried to forget that Amy and Karma were actually people who did exist.

Now that Karma knew, she had no other choice.

She drove back to Amy's house and parked one cul de sac over. Amy wouldn't expect it but she needed to do it. She walked quietly to Amy's window and jimmied it open, sneaking inside.

Amy was sleeping and her mascara looked smeared like she had been crying after a long long night.

Karma snuck in and tip-toed to the door, locking it and taking off her shoes. She pulled her shirt off and slipped into Amy's bed, climbing over her body until she was on top of her and staring down.

She looked like Amy. She looked like she could come to life and laugh and smile and be happy and normal again. Her Amy had very few problems. Her amy didn't have to worry about boarding school and rejection and a life without her.

Karma laid her body down on top of her and dipped her head to kiss at her lips.

Amy rose to meet her, her body reacting to her touch. Karma kissed and felt as Amy's hand flew up into her hair tenderly and held her head, pushing her into her.

Amy's other hand trailed down to Karma's hip and pushed Karma's body down against her center. Amy gasped, waking up.

"Mmm, Karma?!" Amy moaned unhappily.

"Shhh," Karma said, taking Amy's hands in her own and pinning them down on the bed so she wouldn't fight.

Karma kissed her and Amy stopped struggling. She couldn't open her eyes though. It couldn't be real. She felt Karma's hands on her wrists and her body rubbing up on her.

"Uhhh," Amy moaned painfully, pretending it was a dream, a wonderful dream.

"I want you," Karma said, whispering soft into Amy's ear.

"No," Amy said, freaking out. It wasn't a dream. It was real. She stop Karma and pushed her off of her. "Karma, just go," Amy said, getting up and finding her shirt on the ground and putting it on.

"I love you," Karma said, looking up at her from the bed. She wanted to plead with her and beg.

"I can't Karma," Amy said, shaking her head. She couldn't look at her, she really couldn't.

"Why?" Karma begged.

"Do I really need a reason?!" Amy spat. "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!" Amy yelled and pointed towards the window that was still open and just there.

There was noise in the hall, it had to be Farrah.

"Don't do this," Karma begged with tears rushing her.

"GET OUT KARMA!" Amy yelled.

"Amy, honey? Is everything alright?" Farrah asked from the other side of the door.

Karma grabbed her shirt and hopped out the window, staring back at her friend painfully as Amy shut the window hard and cold with a tight evil slam.

For a second, Karma had actually thought that was going to work…


	3. Chapter 3

_*ahhh, I can't stop writing this!*_

_*M rating*_

**Chapter Three**

**Fine, Just Take Me**

**Part I**

After the morning, Karma spent all day with the taste of Amy on her lips and the smell of Amy on her body. Just walking ached. She couldn't believe the things that had been happening.

Feeling alone and bored, she went straight to the school because she knew Liam would be there. He ran the track in the morning every day. Sometimes Karma would go and watch. It had been a habit of hers ever since the dreams started about Amy. It helped her to relax. She'd concentrate on his running and the way the air felt and the emptiness of the stadium. It was calming.

Liam liked it actually. It meant Karma didn't hate him. He never wanted her to hate him.

Today she climbed the bleachers mournfully, hugging herself as she went. She sat off to the side and put her feet up on the metal seat in front of her, leaning forward.

Liam knew it was her. He saw a figure and just knew.

"What brings you here so early?" He asked, running over to her. He wasn't wearing a shirt and he was dripping with sweat.

"Bad day," Karma said truthfully.

"Already?!" Liam thought out loud.

"Amy's back." Karma said.

"Oh," Liam sighed. He had heard about what happened to her. The guilt in him was heavy and unrelenting. He felt fully responsible even though he did little to try and change Amy's punishment.

"Oh," Karma mirrored with a forced smile that could maybe cover up the fact that she was about to burst into tears.

"There's something else…" Liam noticed. He walked up the bleachers to sit near her.

Karma leaned her body back, tucking her elbows onto the bleacher behind her.

"She's different, Liam," Karma sighed, her eyes searching the sky in her pain.

"What happened?"

"She's mean," Karma gritted her teeth almost in disbelief, her eyes squinting to hold back the rage. Liam watched as she huffed out an exasperated sigh.

"Did she do something to you?" He was worried.

"No, not really, she's just…" Frustration was taking over. Karma wanted the words but they wouldn't come. She tucked her hair behind her ear since it was blowing in the wind. Liam watched her nervously.

"I'm sorry," he said. There was nothing else he could think.

"I know," Karma said, taking his hand and squeezing it. They sat there a long time together. It was nice to have company.

Karma eventually told him about the club and the morning she had. He couldn't believe it.

**Part II**

After noon Shane got another text.

AMY: Baxter's party

That was all that it said.

He called Karma right away.

Morning moved into afternoon. For Karma, the time that elapsed between kissing Amy and arriving at the party was excruciating. Karma left Liam around 9am. She had nothing but time to dwell and stir and try and think of a plan to get Amy back and wake Amy up inside.

When she heard about the text there was no question, she would go. If she had to be a punching bag, she would be. Amy meant that much to her, she wasn't just going to let her disappear.

Shane came over around 7 and felt relieved to see that Karma was already looking killer. She was wearing a shorter dress this time, a tighter one. And her hair tumbled down over her shoulders in immaculate waves, adding fire to that certain unreadable something in her eyes. If Shane had to guess, that unreadable something was a sexual hunger. He stared and felt the air leave his chest. Just standing near her, he could feel it.

"Is it too late to trade in my gay card?" Shane asked, taking her in. He walked around her, surveying the situation. Karma's ass looked undeniably grabbable in that get-up. "Damn!" He exhaled. "You are not fucking around anymore."

"I've gotta fight if I want to win," she sighed, spraying herself with perfume between her breasts and on her neck.

"I'm not kidding, I feel like a man!" He almost growled. "I just want to take you right now," he said, grabbing her waist. He was having a bit of an identity crisis and objectifying her with his thirsty eyes as he circled as he would circle a piece of priceless art. Karma just laughed. She was too nervous to feel relief at how apparently sexy she was.

They were both thinking about yesterday. Karma could've looked like a mushroom or a runway model and Amy would've treated her exactly the same. To be honest, ever since their first kiss Amy had always found Karma sexy. She didn't have to change herself or dress herself up. Amy wanted her all the same.

This would be the third time in two days that Karma Ashcroft tried to seduce Amy Raudenfeld.

**Part III**

Shane drove and Karma nervously bounced her leg the whole way there, shaking the car at all the stop signs.

"Will you calm down," Shane said. "If she doesn't want to take you right where you stand, she has no pulse and she's officially a vampire, case closed."

"Shane," Karma whined. "I have three days to find out what's going on. She's making this impossible."

"Well, you're making up for lost time." Shane wished someone wanted him that bad. His thoughts flew to Pablo who was off on a mission in Africa, digging wells and bringing clean water to the masses. He was such a catch but Shane hated the waiting.

They got to Baxter's around 7:30. People were already laughing on the lawn with beers in their hands. Inside they were playing beer pong in the kitchen, Karma and Shane passed several people making out on Baxter's couches and floor.

"The second this stops being typical is the second I drop dead," Shane joked, holding on to Karma's hand.

Lauren had just lost and been ordered to drink. Karma watched her curse and down a beer.

If Lauren was there already, Amy could be too. Karma's heart beat quick as she whipped her head around to search every corner. She looked everywhere but no Amy.

"Calm down, just let it happen," Shane said.

"I'm gonna check outside," Karma thought. Her Amy wouldn't be inside with the crowds. But her Amy never would've gone to El Fuego either so there was really no predicting things.

As soon as Karma stepped outside Amy walked in front of her wordlessly and took her hand, pulling her along back inside past the beer pong and the throngs. Serena Ryder's Baby Come Back was playing on the loudspeakers as Amy walked up the stairs and kept walking to the end of the hall where a door was shut and she opened it. Karma watched her nervously. Amy was holding her hand so loosely she felt if she let go at all she might just fall.

As they crossed into the room Amy squeezed Karma's hand tight and pulled her fast, almost throwing her onto the bed. Karma watched almost shocked as Amy turned and shut the door, locking it quick. When Amy turned around her eyes were hungry and clouded.

She didn't wait or speak. Amy stepped forward and fell to her knees in front of Karma, peeling her heels off first and then Karma's, throwing them across the room. She sent her hands to Karma's knees and pushed them up Karma's thighs slowly, staring into Karma's eyes as she pushed the hem of Karma's dress all the way up to her ass. When she pushed forward Karma's legs opened and Amy's body slid between them. With her hands on Karma's ass, Amy pulled Karma into herself in one swift motion.

"Shit!" Karma breathed, as Amy licked at her neck and sucked. She felt Amy's body between her legs rolling into her center. Amy didn't stop there though. She tugged at Karma's underwear and moved back, pulling them out and off. "Amy," Karma gasped trying to gather herself. But Amy was back between her legs, holding her to her hard and kissing her neck again, moving her tongue up behind Karma's ear. Karma was panting and weak. She felt her body being pushed back little by little as Amy devoured her, touching her everywhere.

Karma's legs began to squeeze at Amy's sides with the pressure Amy was putting on her center.

Amy let go and unzipped the back of her dress, standing up and letting it fall.

"Ma-Maybe we should talk," Karma said. She was holding half her body up on her elbows as Amy stood in front of her. Amy took one look at her and tucked her hands beneath Karma's knees, pulling Karma to the end of the bed and falling ontop of her fast. She wasn't interested in talking.

She kissed Karma hard and breathed loud into her mouth. Taking her hands up to Karma's, she pressed them down on the bed above Karma's head. Karma laced her fingers with Amy's and squeezed as Amy pushed them down.

"Oh my God!" Karma moaned feeling hot. The way Amy was touching her, it was overwhelming and it flustered her into motionlessness.

"I'm gonna fuck you," Amy exhaled a pained yet determined whisper into Karma's ear, licking her neck and letting her hands trail down Karma's arms as she kissed down her body, pulling the top of Karma's dress down hard and sucking at her breast causing Karma to gasp and arch upward. Karma pushed at Amy's head, holding her to her.

"Oh my God!" She moaned again. One of Amy's hands worked its way from the top of Karma's breast all the way down her side and to the back of her thigh, lifting Karma's leg up and pushing at her with her stomach on her center.

There was no warning for what came next. Amy's tongue traveled back to Karma's neck and then her mouth. As she kissed her, Karma felt something enter. Amy had taken two fingers and ran them slowly inside of Karma's wet folds, bypassing her clit and entering straight into that place that had pulsed with its emptiness just seconds before.

"UHHHH," Karma moaned into Amy's mouth as Amy filled her. She sat up as Amy fucked and held her.

Amy broke away the kiss and held at Karma's neck, looking straight at her and watching the desperate eyes that were seeing her now. Karma's eyes had clouded up with desire and she stared at Amy desperately wanting all that she saw and so much more.

"Aw, fuck," Karma breathed as Amy pushed and pushed and pushed inside of her just hard enough and fast enough to have her speechless, all the time watching her face.

Karma felt her toes point and her body tense. She couldn't breathe while it happened. Her eyes closed tight and Amy fucked her into temporary paralysis.

Karma came and Amy kissed her as her body slowly unclenched. She laid Karma back down on the bed placed her chest on top of hers, trapping her again, kissing her all over, surrounding her with heat and wetness and that familiar smell of the friend Karma had missed so very much.

Karma felt like sleeping just then. She closed her eyes and smiled helplessly. It had been so perfect it was almost unreal.

"That was…" She panted overwhelmed, holding her head with one hand.

Amy slid off of her and began to get dressed.

Karma didn't register it until she heard the zip of Amy's dress and the clunk of one of her heels on the floor.

"Wh-where are you going?!" She sat up.

Amy put her shoes on and turned away. She unlocked the door and slipped out, shutting it behind her.

Karma rolled over on the bed and screamed into the pillow. There was only the wetness between her legs to prove that it had actually happened and Amy had actually been real.

Downstairs as Bastille's Laura Palmer filled the room with drumbeats, Shane watched as Amy passed the kitchen and walked straight out the front door and into the street.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

**Drastic Times Call For Drastic Measures**

**Part I**

The days were running out. Summer was long and it had only just begun but Amy was being sent back soon. Shane had told Karma that much at their planned meeting. They both wanted to save her and stop her from her pain.

Originally, Amy had seven days. A week at home to visit before being sent back to that hell that had damaged her so much.

Karma wanted her, it was true. But that wasn't the important thing. It wasn't all about desire. It was important that Amy knew she wasn't alone. Karma would give her life for Amy Raudenfeld and none of that had changed.

"You've gotta help her," Shane said. "I mean, unless you don't care. In that case tell me, and I'll try." He knew it was a spiral. He knew the symptoms because they were clear. Amy wasn't just acting out, she was drowning. That place was swallowing her up and eating her soul. It was taking away every bit of her that was pure and calm and open to the world.

When Karma told him what happened at Baxter's house Shane was stunned yet elated.

"I want to help her," Karma said.

"Maybe you should do it then," Shane said. He knew well what Karma had been planning. She'd drop out of school. They'd go away.

"What if she doesn't want to? What if she's scared?"

"She'll want to," Shane fought. "Her other choice is to die in there like an animal. You saw what it's done to her. She's broken down. She's changed."

"I am so mad at Farrah!" Karma burned.

"What a fucking mess," Shane said, wishing he could take it back or help in some way that didn't involve ruining his own life.

"I'll do it," Karma decided feeling strong.

"It won't be easy. She won't believe you."

Somehow Shane knew it all. He hadn't done much for the town queen but he had watched an awful lot of tv and learned an awful lot about the common reactions of the every man and his pals.

"I'll get her in my car and I'll drive her away."

"But what if she fights?"

"Why would she?"

"On her second day here she stopped you from having sex with her, Karma," Shane looked over at her with condescension. "If she stops you from doing that she can stop you from anything."

He was right, she guessed. When Amy pushed her, Karma just fell. Before last year Amy would die for her without a question. If there was a pit of lava and Amy had to choose between letting Karma fall or throwing herself on the liquid flame, Amy would've chosen the fire, it was clear. Karma used to know the answers but she didn't know them anymore.

Amy must've felt really alienated in there to completely cut Karma off.

"If she doesn't come with me, I'll cry," Karma said. They had the whole summer ahead of them if it worked. There was no need for Amy to be sent off to summer school when her grades were always average and her behavior always kind.

"Come on then, what are we waiting for?" Shane asked.

They'd do it together. It was the only way it could work. Karma thought about grabbing Liam. He was the muscle. He could keep her there.

"Liam will help, won't he?" Karma asked.

"You really think that's a good idea?" Shane asked.

"If she leaves, we can't chase her."

"If she leaves she made her choice."

"She doesn't know what she wants Shane, she's scared!"

The more thinking Karma did the more sure she became. In her entire life Amy had never seemed so scared. Karma's mind flashed back to the other morning in Amy's bed. When Karma had kissed her then Amy had kept her eyes shut like it wasn't real.

"She couldn't see me," Karma breathed. Shane heard her and just stared.

"Yeah so?" He asked.

"She thinks it's not real,"

"Holy hell that is one giant well of sadness," Shane confessed. He hadn't thought of it that way.

"If we don't steal her she'll never forgive us," Karma said.

"Well, I guess we have no choice then," Shane said.

"I guess not," Karma agreed.

They'd go in the morning, through the window just like before.

**Part II**

Liam snuck in through the window and covered Amy's mouth with a piece of tape. She woke up instantly, her eyes popping open in panic as she fought. He took her hands and held them tight as Karma ducktaped them and then moved to her ankles, taping them as well, halfway up her calves.

Liam tried to calm her but it was hard to be calm about being bound in your underwear in the morning by intruders who broke in through the window you should've bolted shut if you ever really wanted to be safe.

"It's going to be okay," Karma said, watching as Amy rolled her eyes obviously exacerbated. "We're stealing you," Karma said. "The less you fight, the easier it'll be."

Amy had no choice and that was clear. She let her body go limp and planned on escaping on her first second alone.

Karma left a note for Farrah on Amy's smiley stationary. It simply said: _Amy's with me, call me if you want to talk. Karma._

If Farrah couldn't find Karma's number she was the worst mother in the history of mothers.

Liam scooped Amy up in his arms and pulled her with him through the window.

They walked her out to Shane's car and placed her in safely, not giving her freedom to move or fight.

"Are you sure it's okay?" Karma asked.

"From what you said, it seems she needs a place," Liam sighed. "It's all my fault anyway. If we hadn't… Well, you know. None of this would've happened."

"It's not your fault that Farrah's a bad parent." Karma insisted.

Shane started the car and drove. They were going to Liam's house. He had a pool house that no one used. A guest house with three whole rooms and a kitchen and a garden.

Karma held Amy's head on her lap and stared down at her, petting her. She brushed Amy's hair out of her face and rubbed her fingers on Amy's cheek. Amy calmed in her touch and shut her eyes.

They drove in through the gate and took a right instead of the usual middle path. There was so much land, the Booker's would have no clue. Not that they'd care at all if they ever found out. Amy Raudenfeld didn't even blip on their radar.

When they parked Liam carried her out strongly, hugging her to his body. They got her inside and locked her in several times. Karma stayed with her and locked the door to her new room.

With Amy on the bed she felt guilty and horrible for taping her mouth and dragging her out like that. The boys left them alone.

"I'm going to take the tape of your mouth," Karma said. "Please don't be mad. I had to," Karma grimaced and started to peel it off little by little.

"Mmmm!" Amy screamed and Karma pulled it off fast. Going slow wasn't helping. "HOLY SHIT!" Amy screamed.

"Sorry!" Karma said, sitting next to Amy on the bed. There was still tape on Amy's ankles and wrists. "I had to stop you," Karma said.

"Why?!" Amy yelled.

"If I didn't you'd go back."

"So, you want me to stay?" Amy asked grumpily. It wasn't her choice to leave. That was never her choice.

"I've never seen you like this," Karma confessed. "Of course I want you to stay," she wanted to hug her. It seemed dangerous though given all that had happened. Amy kept her eyes on the ceiling. She didn't want to look at Karma anymore.

"Can you at least untie me?" Amy asked.

"Not yet, sorry," Karma confessed. She sat down next to her on the bed and tried to stay calm.

"Why are you here?" Amy scoffed. "You've got me. I'm stuck. You can go away now." Amy spat out in frustration. Her eyes filled with tears of rage. She hated that Karma was trying so hard. She hadn't expected it and it hurt her. All the thoughts she had been thinking all year contradicted everything that was happening. She hadn't read Karma's letters and when Karma tried to talk to her she just assumed the worst and ignored her altogether.

"I'm in love with you Amy." Karma said.

Amy's face fell a little and her eyes glanced up at Karma pitifully as tears filled them completely and began to spill out.

Amy turned into Karma's lap, her bound hands trying hard to hug her waist.

Karma held her desperately and kissed her head and face, endlessly as she wept.

It had been all Amy wanted after all of this time and it burned in her ears after all she'd been through. Like one large drop of bittersweet poison on her tongue, the truth spread through her like a raging fire and it burned.


	5. Chapter 5

_*I am trying to write this and it is just breaking my goddamn heart…*_

**Chapter Five**

**Slow Dancing In A Burning Room**

**Part I**

Karma laid down on the bed and searched Amy's expression. Amy appeared pained and broken, her eyes shut tight as she wept. At least the wailing had stopped. Karma moved to face her and kissed her tenderly, sliding her tongue into her mouth and feeling that heat of having that touch returned. To kiss her now felt heavenly. She'd dreamed about it so much it was like coming home after being away. Home to that person, the one she wanted in all the world.

Amy gasped into Karma's mouth as she kissed her back slow, tasting what it felt like to kiss the girl she loved and longed for, to really kiss her for real. Before, at the party and the club, Amy thought for sure that Karma just missed her. She never thought, not even for a second that things had changed and Karma was in love.

"I love you," Karma said, holding at Amy's face and watching her. Amy's eyes held-shut as Karma rest her forehead onto hers.

"You couldn't have told me this a year ago?" Amy whined, feeling her hands bound and her legs stuck on the bed. She was struggling and Karma saw.

"I tried," Karma said, kissing her cheeks and staring at her again.

"I want to hug you," Amy said, opening her eyes and looking down at her hands in frustration. She wanted to feel Karma's body. It felt unreal still. Karma was too far away. Tears were still leaving her as she fought helplessly to free herself.

Karma smiled as tears left her too. She looked down at Amy's hands and pulled the tape off as quickly as she could. As soon as she was free, Amy wrapped Karma up in her arms and rolled over onto her back, kissing her as she smiled and wept.

Karma smiled too, laughing. Amy was kissing her so desperately and with such passion, it overwhelmed her. Amy was serious too, so much different than she used to be. When she smiled into her mouth, Karma felt her heart melt. She missed that smile so much. It was all she lived for and now she was tasting it. There could be nothing like that feeling.

"Slow down, tiger," Karma laughed as Amy's lips fought to keep hers. She put a hand over Amy's that was resting on her cheek.

"You have no idea how much I missed you," Amy breathed, searching Karma's eyes desperately. She wanted it so to be true.

Karma kissed Amy's hand, the one that had been touching her face. She took it in her own and pushed it down on the bed by Amy's head, bringing her face up to Amy's and kissing her again, making Amy go slower and softer. She wanted her to move with her and feel safe. So much of Amy's return had been aggressive and fast. Karma wanted the slowness back, the security and the tenderness. Amy's chest was rising fast beneath her own and she put a hand on it just to feel Amy's heart as it pounded.

"Uhh," Amy whimpered. Her hand was on Karma's hip and Karma's hip bone had been pushing down onto Amy right where it teased.

"Mmm," Karma hummed, noticing it now. She rest her face on Amy's neck and stopped.

"Please don't stop," Amy begged, her desperation painful. All she wanted was to be loved like this and touching. No one paid attention, not one person all year. When Karma looked at her she wanted to cry and when she touched her she wanted to fight and scream and ask WHY?! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS WHEN YOU DON'T EVEN CARE?! It was irrational but it was still there, still in her. It was all she had felt all year. Amy had been completely abandoned out there.

"Give me a minute," Karma couldn't stop her smiling face. Amy made her so unbelievably happy. Having her now after missing her so much, it was a precious gift, simply priceless. "I want to enjoy you," Karma smiled with flushed cheeks. She tasted Amy's neck with her tongue and wanted to see what it was like to be the one doing the touching. She took care with her. Kissed her soft. Her tongue teasing over the pulse point on Amy's neck.

Amy gasped shallowly. Her eyes more open now than they had been all year.

"Shhhh," Karma said, feeling Amy's heart and how fast her breathing had become. Amy was almost desperate for air, gasping for it shallowly and shaking beneath Karma's body, on fire with the need to be touched.

Karma rolled off of her. "Maybe we should rest," Karma said, moving Amy's hair from her face and watching her stare.

"I don't want to rest," Amy breathed, fighting her urges. She wanted it all right away and she wanted it forever.

"I like seeing you," Karma smiled, grabbing Amy's hand.

"I forgot how beautiful you were," Amy swallowed, staring.

"You scare me like this," Karma confessed. Amy was acting like she was about to disappear forever, like tomorrow she'd be somewhere else far away.

"Losing you was scary," Amy said, not wanting to look away. She couldn't count the number of times she thought back about the wedding night. The nights pining and crying. The stomach aches alone and the days off when she would just sleep and sleep and sleep.

"You didn't lose me, I was always here." Karma breathed.

"I thought you hated me," Amy choked out shallowly, her chest burning. She thought of her small twin bed and the girl they roomed her with who wouldn't even look at her let alone speak a word.

"I never hated you," Karma confessed, holding her hand and kissing it again and again and again. She stared at Amy and watched as Amy closed her eyes at the touch of Karma's lips on her skin and her hand in her own.

"You feel so good," Amy said sadly. No matter what Karma did, tears still fell unwavering from Amy's tired eyes. Karma could tell she was still teetering between acceptance and denial, sound sanity and intangible madness. Amy was feeling everything so strong and it wasn't like Karma was feeling. Karma was all giddy and excitement, she was open and ready, her pulse racing healthily as she craved her. Amy was different though, she was heavy and hard, balled up and tangled. When Karma touched her she could feel how one touch could just break Amy apart and shatter her completely. Amy was filled with doubt and sadness, there were so many broken fragments. Putting them together felt impossible. She couldn't be stable, each touch was disruptive but Amy needed it so bad. Healing those wounds would take time. Karma was scared to do too much and push too far. Amy's breath was already shallow and thin.

"Get used to it," Karma said, rolling towards her and searching her face yet again.

"It doesn't feel real," Amy said, choking back on all her fears. Karma felt as Amy's body shook beneath her.

"It is," Karma reassured, looking down at her wanting for her to know. Karma placed her thumb on Amy's chin and her fingers on her cheek. She searched her eyes and wanted for that sea to calm. "I'm not going anywhere," she said. "And neither are you." She kissed Amy again, pulling back and feeling Amy's gasp in her mouth, like a breath just for her.

It was the only thing Amy wanted to hear, that she could stay and Karma would have her. Tears spilled out of her eyes again as she broke away and sat up to hug Karma on the bed, still shaking.

She didn't want to go away again. She wanted to stay.

Karma held her and breathed her in. She would have to be strong and gentle. She would have to be overly kind. Amy shook in her arms and she held her loosely.

"All I want to do is fix you." Karma whispered.

Amy felt herself smile and she tried to relax.

**Part II**

Karma's phone started ringing around 9:30 am.

"It's your mom," she said. "Do you want to answer or should I?"

Amy took it hesitantly and picked it up. Karma watched and listened, hoping it wouldn't be too bad.

"Hi Mom. Yeah, I'm fine." Amy stood up and moved her hair out of her face. By this time the need for tape was long gone. Amy had chosen to stay and she wasn't about to change her mind. "I know mom," Amy said sadly. "Yeah, I know."

Karma got nervous, "Amy, give me the phone," she said, holding out her hand. Amy just stared at her feeling helpless. Her mother didn't want her to be with Karma at all, it had been one of their rules. "Amy," Karma ordered. She waited and Amy finally took two steps forward and let her have her phone back. Karma watched as Amy held her stomach with one of her arms.

"Hi Farrah, it's Karma." Amy watched nervously. "I was not aware, no." Karma said, standing strong. "Well, Amy isn't doing too well," Karma said, watching Amy sit down. "You should have thought about that before you sent her away," Karma said authoritatively. On the other end of the line Farrah was shocked. Karma Ashcroft had no right parenting her. She was a teenage girl with a penchant for lying.

"No Farrah!" Karma almost yelled. "I don't know if you've noticed but Amy is so broken that she's not even the same person anymore and no I don't think she should come home. I think you made a mistake and I think you hurt her and I think Amy needs to be with someone who actually cares about her because she's acting like everyone in her life abandoned her because they didn't care."

There was a long silence on the other side of the line. Karma had struck a chord. She shook a little, wondering what she should do. When Farrah didn't try and speak again she simply hung up the phone.

"Whoa," Amy said.

"Well, I guess that happened," Karma said. She hadn't expected herself to be so upset.

"I shouldn't have slept with Liam," Amy breathed.

"Teenage girls have been sleeping with teenage boys since the dawn of man!" Karma yelled. She realized she was getting overly angry. Farrah wasn't there to see it and it couldn't be helping Amy. "Look," she said, turning to Amy and taking her hands. "Farrah sent you there more for the gay thing than anything else. There's nothing wrong with you and there never was."

"Then why do I feel wrong," Amy thought.

Karma felt herself falling to her knees.

"You are beautiful and smart and independent," she breathed in, thinking, "you love with your whole heart and other people just don't." It was frustrating to see Amy so lost. Farrah had fucked her up big time with that school. "I can't believe you had to stay there all year thinking that no one loved you."

Karma looked down at the ground sadly and when she looked back up Amy saw tears in her eyes.

"It wasn't that bad," Amy lied, hugging herself.

"It obviously was, Amy," Karma wiped a tear from her cheek and stood up. She couldn't change the things that had happened. It was all her fault somehow. Every last bit of it.

"Wanna watch tv?" Amy asked. Karma laughed and swiveled in her spot. She wiped the tears from her cheeks.

"I would actually love that, yes," she confessed, still laughing.

"I'm sort of starving," Amy confessed.

"Then we'll eat too."

"Sounds like a date," Amy said sweetly, forgetting her mother and her past.

Being with Karma was like remembering how easy things used to be. If she tried not to think about it she could smile again.

They ordered pizza and watched House Hunters. Their favorite part was verbally abusing the obscenely rich home shoppers for their idiotic demands and wishy-washy behavior.

Shane and Liam came back around 1pm with nachos and a crazy story about some hick in a pickup truck who tried to raise them and ran off the road. They helped him get a tow-truck and it was really awkward.

Once they were all there and they calmed down enough, they drank beer together and played board games.

Karma kept her phone off all day.

Around 6pm Karma and Amy retreated back to the room and fell asleep together. They just wanted to be alone.

Amy woke up around 10pm and watched Karma sleep, remembering the year before and how scared she was. She held her sweetly, breathing her in while Pretty Little Liars played in the background.

It was the perfect day somehow, despite the duct-tape and the crying and all the truths coming out.

Karma woke a little after 10:30pm. Amy had been holding her so quietly that when she woke it was because of an accident on the show and not the nearness of her or the sweet soft breath on her cheek.

"Wow," she said. She realized she was in Amy's arms and hugged herself to her harder. "I must've been comfortable," she sighed happily.

"I was watching you," Amy said.

"Oh?" Karma asked, intrigued.

"I keep feeling like this is all just a dream."

Karma rolled over and sat up on her pillows. "Come 'ere," she said, motioning for Amy to hug her. Amy laid down and let her hold her again.

"This _is_ real," Karma sighed. It felt so good to be near her again.

They were fast asleep by 11, safe in each other's arms.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

**Crowd Surf Off A Cliff**

**Part I**

Karma called her mother in the morning. Staying at Liam's was no problem with her parents. She told them everything about Amy and the kidnapping. Her mother knew all about Karma's new feelings and about the way Amy had been ignoring Karma's every attempt at contact from the time she was sent off to boarding school to this recent week at home. What her mother did not know was that Amy and Karma had been having sex. Her mother didn't know about El Fuego or Baxter's party. Her mother didn't know that Amy came back so damaged that she just took things at first and used Karma. But Karma's mother would now know that Amy was safe and with her like old times. Truthfully, if Karma's mother had known all the other things that had happened, she probably would be a little nervous to have Karma and Amy in a mystery location somewhere in town. But that's exactly why Karma couldn't tell her. It'd be fine for the time being. Karma was sure.

Things got complicated over the phone when Karma's mother began to talk about Amy's mom. Apparently Farrah had been over to the Ashcroft residence. She had not only been distraught but angry. Obviously she was looking for her daughter. Why Farrah would be worried about Amy being somewhere with Karma was beyond all of their realms of rationalism. No one could say why Farrah was so very upset about Amy Raudenfeld rekindling her sweet friendship with Karma Ashcroft. Karma's mother chalked it up to the fact that Amy and Karma were still too young to be escaping off to boys houses at all hour. Things like that did not bother Karma's mother because she trusted her daughter's judgment. But Farrah obviously had a problem.

Karma wasn't sure what to say though. On the one hand it looked suspicious that she was practically hiding Amy from her mom. On the other, if Farrah knew where Amy was, what was to stop her from coming over and physically taking Amy away?

Karma wanted to ask her mom but she didn't know how.

"Promise me you'll go see Farrah soon," her mother said.

"Okay," Karma hesitated, wanting not to promise something that she knew she couldn't keep.

"Be safe. I'm glad you're together," her mom said, hanging up the phone.

"What was all that?" Amy asked. She had been half-listening while petting the cat that Liam had let in from the main house.

"Your mom went to my house," Karma gulped.

"Shit," Amy said, holding her head. "I have to talk to her…" It was the worst thing to know. If they didn't go to her soon, Farrah was bound to send in the cops. Under-aged girls aren't allowed to just runaway anymore.

"She knows you're safe," Karma reminded. She knows you're with me, she wanted to say.

"Like she cares about that!" Amy groaned, remembering the events of her last calendar year. "All she wants is to lock me up and shut me up. She doesn't care anymore about what I want." It was too sad to hear. Amy used to be the one person that Farrah lived for. Ever since Bruce, her importance and meaning to Farrah had shifted.

"What should we do?" Karma asked. "I can call her again… You can call her," Karma thought. "If we go over there we'll have to take Liam."

"If she even sees Liam she'll throw a fit!"

"What about Lauren?" It was a longshot but maybe if Lauren saw Amy and came as some sort of ambassador if would appease Farrah at least for a little while.

"Worth a shot," Amy shrugged. When they talked about family Karma could see how Amy huddled into herself and reclaimed that closed body-language she had inherited from her solitary dark year.

"We can have her meet us somewhere," Karma thought.

"Fine…" Amy didn't want to do it but her mother was probably only seconds away from putting out a missing persons report. What bothered Amy the most was that her mom only cared now that Amy was with Karma. All the days leading up to this when Amy was going off to parties and losing herself in strangers and booze, those days didn't matter to her mom. Her mom didn't care how broken she had made her.

Thinking about it all she had a better mind to ignore her mother altogether like her mother had ignored her.

"I'll do what you want," Karma said, seeing the way Amy was beginning to close herself off. She was practically sitting up in a ball on the couch with her arms over her knees and her face hid from Karma's stare.

"Let's call Lauren. It's a good idea."

**Part II**

"Amy?! Where the hell are you?! Mom has been up all night, she's sick with this!" Lauren had obviously stayed up too.

"I told you guys I was fine."

"Is that Amy?!" Amy could hear her mother's nervous voice in the background. She shut her eyes to the painful sound of her mother finally giving a shit about her and at the stupidest time.

"Are you going to talk or what?" Lauren asked. She knew if Farrah took the phone Amy would probably just hang up. Lauren wasn't a fool. She had seen how Amy had come out of things after school.

"I wanna meet you. I can't see her right now," Amy said. On the other end of the line Lauren exhaled heavily.

"Fine, where," she simply decided to just go. There was a diner they had been to together a couple of times.

"30 minutes. Marie's."

"Done." Lauren said, hanging up the phone.

Amy just stared at it. The idea was risky but she could always run. Her mother couldn't hold her.

"Okay?" Karma asked tenderly, moving to hold Amy's hand.

"You'll come. right?" Amy asked, her eyes filled with tears.

"Of course!" Karma said as if to not come might actually kill her. She hugged Amy tight on the bed and kissed her hair. "Of course," she repeated.

**Part III**

They all went. Shane, Liam, Karma and Amy. It was like they needed to all be together. Plus, Amy had a sinking feeling that Farrah would follow Lauren or something bad was going to happen.

They got there before Lauren and watched as Lauren pulled into the parking lot in her little sports car. Her pop music blasted loudly and she slammed the door as she got out, walking straight into the restaurant to look for her.

"Here goes," Amy said, getting out. Liam and Shane decided to stay in the car and watch for Farrah. They could text them a warning if Farrah or Bruce showed up.

"It'll be fine," Karma said. Amy just shot her a cold look.

"Hey," Amy said, approaching Lauren from behind.

"Amy, Jesus!" Lauren said, turning and hitting her on the chest with her clutch.

"Sorry," Amy breathed.

"How many?"

"3," Lauren shot. She noticed Karma there too. They were seated in a booth on the other side near the windows. Amy sat and slunk down. "What is with you?!" Lauren said angrily. "Mom's upset Amy."

"You're calling her mom now?"

"I've been calling her Mom since the wedding but you obviously haven't noticed," Lauren said.

"3 coffees, please." Karma said, cutting off the waitress before she could fully approach.

"How masculine of you Karma, thank you," Lauren thanked sarcastically.

"Good to see you too," Karma said softly, wanting to keep things as civil as humanly possible.

"So, what's this about?" Lauren asked.

The waitress dropped three mugs and filled them while they all exchanged cautionary looks. When no one spoke Karma did.

"Amy's not going back to that school." Karma said.

"Says who?" Lauren asked.

"Me," Amy said. She was going to stand up.

"Mother won't have it," Lauren said, sipping the hot liquid. She wasn't sure what to say seeing as how she'd be exactly the same way if something like this had happened to her.

"Then I won't have mother," Amy said, using Lauren's almost cold title for Farrah.

"You did sleep with Liam," Lauren said, rolling her eyes.

"Oh like you're a virgin," Amy scoffed.

"Hey! Watch it!" Lauren said. "What I do with my body is secret." She looked side to side and fixed the napkin on her lap. "I would never bring a boy to the house!" Lauren scoffed carefully, wanting for other people not to hear. No one cared and no one was listening but Lauren's behavior was extremely paranoid and it did draw attention.

"I was drunk Lauren," Amy whined. Karma smiled to herself remembering it all. It was such a mess. Liam was so very careless. That's why she had liked Liam at first, it really was.

"Your mistakes landed you in that jail." Lauren reminded.

"I can't go back there."

"So what?! We're just going to pretend we're not a family anymore?"

"Can you talk to Mom for me? Please?" Amy begged.

"Farrah is not going to calm down until she sees you," Lauren reminded.

"What are we-"

"Number 1, Number 2, & Number 3. Scrambled, Homefries, Rye." Karma ordered. They had been to the cafe before and they always ordered those specials. She knew this way no one could be upset. She'd take whatever they rejected. Her goal of course was for things to run as smooth as humanly possible.

"Jesus Christ Karma, could just stop that?!" Lauren was peeved.

"Sorry," Karma said, looking away. She felt like a monitor or something. Like in the asylum when they put a sane person in the room to make sure the crazies don't claw each other's eyes out. Not that she felt particularly sane. This spat just didn't have to involve her. The more she tried to disappear from the table, the better things would go. But she had to be there for Amy, she just had to.

"What should I do?" Amy asked, feeling hopeless.

"You should come home." Lauren said, as if the answer was that simple.

"If I go home Mom isn't going to just magically like me again."

"It'll be a start," Lauren said supportively.

"She'll send me back, Lauren. I've tried talking to her and-"

"I won't let her," Lauren said simply. She was sipping her coffee and pretending she hadn't just sworn her solidarity.

"What?"

"I won't let her. You don't want to go. You're obviously damaged. If she tries I'll fight with you."

"Fight how?"

"Kick, scream… Yell a lot…" Lauren thought. It didn't seem overly complicated to her.

Amy just watched her cautiously. What if Lauren was lying?

"Why would you do that for me?" Amy asked.

"Despite what you may think, I actually like your dumbass." Lauren confessed. "Being alone with those two has not been a picnic. They're so nervous about insulting one another, they barely talk." Lauren was drinking her coffee and feeling relieved to have finally told Amy a little about her feelings. It was a good thing the breakfast was happening. She didn't want Amy away any more than Amy wanted to be away. "And for the record, they were both wrong," Lauren said. She had decided all of a sudden to be fucking frank about it because it all really sucked. She looked Amy in the eyes and leveled with her like before at the wedding. "There is nothing, and there had never been ANYTHING, wrong with you, Amy Raudenfeld. You're a fucking saint. If anyone should've been sent away it was certainly me." Amy hadn't thought about the guilt that Lauren could be feeling. It came straight out of left field.

"I am feeling so attacked right now," Amy joked, cracking a smile. Karma watched as they both broke into soft awkward laughter.

"Oh my God, you guys are totally sisters," Karma burst, feeling sentimental all of a sudden.

"Dammit Ashcroft!" Lauren yelled, wiping a tear from her eye. She had ruined the moment, of course, by pointing it out and removing all it's magic.

"Thanks," Amy said. She wanted to hug her but they were across the table and it would be weird. But her face flushed red and so did Lauren's.

"I missed you…" Lauren said. She wanted to tell her how worried she was. She wrote Amy a couple of times but she was sure that Amy didn't read the letters. If she had read them she would have certainly written back. They were all filled up with apologies and tender concern. Lauren worried a lot more than Amy knew.

**Part IV**

After about 20 minutes, once they were sure the coast was clear, Liam and Shane joined the girls inside. They girls looked happy enough, as they ate. It was almost like there wasn't a problem at all.

Lauren tried not to be flustered by their arrival but she had a particular hatred for Liam Booker and her almost love for Shane confused her greatly. They ordered #2's and ate along with them, talking about all sorts of different things. It was nice.

Outside the restaurant after eating, Karma wasn't sure what to do. Amy was going to go home with Lauren and she hadn't said anything about what to do with herself.

"Karma," Amy said, stopping her on the way to her car. "You're coming," she said, pulling her off toward Lauren's car.

"Your Mom won't like me there," Karma said. She knew it.

"I don't care," Amy said. "I'm not going home without you."

"K," Karma said, anticipating the cave in. She gave Liam her keys and climbed into the back of Lauren's small car.

"It'll be fine, we'll just go in and talk and it'll be just fine," Lauren seemed to be trying to convince herself more than her passengers.

"She's gonna kill me," Amy said, feeling particularly tense.

"She loves you," Lauren reminded.

"No." Amy said. "She stopped loving me somewhere." Amy was sure. She stared out the car at the town.

"Maybe I should go in first and talk to her," Lauren suggested, knowing that things would just turn into a shout-fest as soon as Amy entered.

"Maybe," Amy said, feeling trapped. Her doom was eminent. "If she doesn't want me, I'll run. I'll get emancipated and live with Karma." All the words were sounding real now. Cold but real. All the back-up plans were completely viable. She wasn't going back to that place.

They got to the house and Lauren irrationally parked on the sidewalk just in case anyone tried to trap her in the driveway with another car. She was thinking of Amy but also about the excitement of an escape.

"I'll go in, it'll be fine," Lauren said.

She was gone and Karma and Amy got out and leaned on the car.

"Are you scared?" Karma asked.

"Yup," Amy sighed.

"Me too," Karma confessed. Amy smiled sadly and squeezed Karma's hand.

In no time at all Farrah had ran out of the house and found Amy. It was a terrible disaster. Amy paused as Farrah approached. Farrah slapped her hard on the cheek and stared at her with an obvious burning anger.

"How dare you!" Farrah scoffed, seeing Karma and wanting her to die.

"Farrah?!" Karma said in disbelief. Karma had pulled Amy to her and she was holding her hand over her cheek.

"You want to sleep with every boy in town. Ruin my wedding. Turn into someone I'm ashamed to know?!" Farrah barked.

"Stop!" Karma yelled.

"This is none of your business Karma." Farrah barked, hating her for existing.

"Amy IS my business!" Karma defended.

Lauren had run out after Farrah and seen the whole thing.

"Go home Karma, you don't belong here." Farrah tried but it wouldn't work.

"I AM Amy's family," Karma said, refusing to let her go.

"I am too!" Lauren said authoritatively, running over to them and holding Amy's other side. Amy couldn't speak. She never knew what to say. When her mother attacked her like this she never saw it coming. It wasn't like Farrah. It never was.

"Lauren?!" Farrah seemed confused.

"That place was bad." Lauren said. "It hurt her. And I'm her sister," Lauren defended, trying to explain. "I'm not letting you send her back."

It was so strange to see both her daughters, old and new, huddled together and embracing as if best friends. It was something that Farrah had always wanted. She had forgotten somehow but seeing it now, she knew it was true.

"Wh- you never said…" Farrah gasped, moving her hand to her mouth and wishing she could take back what she had just done.

"Amy, I-" Farrah tried to explain. Her anger had gotten the better of her. She didn't want to slap her but she was so scared and worried. She'd been up all night.

"Don't." Amy said, with tears in her eyes. She was trying to be strong but she wanted to die when things like this happened. She already felt like she'd lost her mother.

Farrah was before her now looking more pained than ever. Once the anger had left her all that was left was regret, clear as day.

"Baby," Farrah sighed, looking panicked. She held her arms out and Amy slowly shrugged Lauren and Karma off of her. She walked slowly to Farrah and fell hard into her arms, wailing as she did so.

They both cried in the driveway clutching onto each other. Karma and Lauren watched almost mesmerized by the sight before noticing one another. Karma took one tear-filled look at Lauren and saw that Lauren was just as broken as her. They fell into a happy hug. All they had wanted was for things to be normal again.

**Part V**

Farrah wasn't sure what had happened really. It could've been Bruce in her ear, pushing her to rectify her daughter. Somehow Lauren Cooper, without trying, seemed the perfect daughter to Farrah. She was so perfect that Farrah couldn't help but feel increasingly insecure about Amy with the closer her and Bruce became.

So, it could've been Bruce. It could've been Lauren. It could've been Amy's crazy lesbian year. It could've been seeing her daughter like that lying softly on top of what Lauren had soon-after called, "The sluttiest and most popular boy in school." It could've been all these things that drove her to snap and take action. Mostly though, Farrah knew it was all her own insecurities and her own doubts about her own parenting and her own hand in Amy's seemingly rebellious acts.

The year was a blur and she tried not to think about Amy. She had hurt her daughter in so many ways. Mostly, she hurt her by sending her away and treating her like a problem that could be easily fixed by others more qualified than the mother whom had raised her since birth. She had failed Amy. She had.

It all came to light rather suddenly. She had been holding it off for so long and she couldn't push it away anymore. Bruce was off on a trip and the girls were all alone. They went inside and Farrah made coffee and fluffy eggs for everyone. It didn't matter that they had all eaten but her. They would all eat again.

Amy's house smelt like it always did. Karma smelt the familiar smells of Lauren, Farrah, and Amy all mixed up together. Cinnamon candles and potpourri, clean linens, and clean white carpets. The Raudenfeld/Cooper house had never felt more like a memory. She breathed it in and hoped it would last.

All their throats were tight as they were all at a loss for what to do or say. Lauren and Karma both sandwiched Amy on the couch and took care to touch her tenderly in little ways. Farrah watched them from the kitchen feeling apprehensive. She had to level with Amy and apologize for all that she had done.

How does a mother apologize though for such a huge misstep in judgment? Mentally, Farrah was preparing herself for a row with Bruce when he got back. His voice had been in her ear and she just never backed down. Even Lauren stood up for Amy. Even Lauren knew it was all wrong. Something about that made Farrah feel secure in her anger towards him.

She mentally chastised herself for quieting all her doubts and pretending that other people could ever know her daughter more. She had let herself lose sight of Amy. She could never correctly apologize for that or take it back. It had been a very long year without her. An entire year in which Amy felt all alone.

"Eggs are ready girls," Farrah called through shallow breath. She walked to the table and pushed eggs onto the small empty plates. They got up and walked over quietly, sitting down and trying not to speak or say things. Farrah sat and picked her fork up but she couldn't eat. She was too distraught. "I'm a horrible mother!" She bawled, her face falling into her hands.

"Mom?" Amy moaned, easily caring when she wanted just to not.

"I let them tell me you were broken! I thought I could fix you!" She wailed. Amy got up and stood behind her mom, rubbing her back.

"Mom, it's okay."

"It is in no way OKAY Amy Raudenfeld!" She yelled, looking up at her with wide eyes and standing to hug her again. She pulled Amy into her as if nothing could ever pull them apart again. "I should divorce Bruce," she said, almost determined.

"Hey now," Lauren said, knowing that this decision seemed just as rash as her last. "Daddy may be harsh but he needs some guidance," Lauren said. She could always get him to see things her way and she knew that he'd do anything for Farrah, anything she could ever want. Lauren stood slowly, suddenly full.

"Your father pushed this on me!" Farrah blamed sadly. "And I LET HIM!" She was angrier at herself, obviously, but it was not Bruce's fault that Farrah let him think it was fine to just talk down about Amy and hold Lauren up to the high-heavens as the perfect picture of what a daughter should be. Farrah adored Lauren but she was seeing it now, the way she should've always treated Amy. Amy was her daughter, after all. If she didn't praise her, who would? Farrah had become this horrible mother.

They all watched anxiously as Farrah ran away to her room.

"Guys?! WHAT THE HELL?!" Amy yelled desperately. She didn't want her mother to be unhappy. She didn't want her to break up with Bruce or fuck up her own life. Especially for her.

"I AM GOING TO FIND HIM! RIGHT NOW!" Farrah said. When she came out of her room she had her purse on and her keys in her hand. "I can't live like this, I can't. I let things happen and I wasn't okay with them. I'm not myself," she shook in her nervousness. So much had been feeling wrong for so long. She had been lying to Bruce. Ignoring Amy. Treating Lauren like the daughter she never had. It was all a mess.

"Maybe you should sleep on it," Amy fought. "Since when has rash ever been the right way to deal with things?"

"I've been thinking all year." Farrah said truthfully, turning to them at the door so that they would understand. "I lied to Bruce. I thought he wouldn't love me if he really knew me… I let myself be embarrassed by you Amy. And you know I adore you." Farrah scoffed, crying crazily and brushing a hand through her feathered hair. "I love you more than I could ever love myself and I let myself do this to you… If that's not crazy I don't know what is…"

They watched as she opened the door sadly and went out. They all listened, stunned, as Farrah's car started up and she drove off rather fast.

"HOLY FUCKING HELL!" Lauren screamed. They were all standing around the table and the uneaten eggs. The can of worms they had unwittingly opened was a messy one.


End file.
